Showing posts with label family relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family relationships. Show all posts

Values-Driven Leadership: Discovering and Developing Your Core Values for Ministry Review

Values-Driven Leadership: Discovering and Developing Your Core Values for Ministry
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Values-Driven Leadership: Discovering and Developing Your Core Values for Ministry ReviewAs a single adult pastor, I have been looking for a book that would be a guide in casting a vision for our ministry for the next 1, 3, and 5 years. Values Driven ministry does an excellent job of taking the reader back to see what drives a God-given vision--it is our biblically based values. (I strongly suggest you also read Malphurs' book: Developing a Vision for Ministry in the 21st Century--it is an incredible companion to this one).Since each of has been uniquely made in God's image we will "see" things differently and, yet, our biblically based values shape and are our basis for ministry. This is where in our uniqueness we are actually drawn together for the glory of God. The book does an excellent job of discussing in chronological order the following leadership and vision matters. CH.1: The Importance of Core Values; Ch. 2: The Definition of Core Values; Ch. 3: The Discovery of Core Values; Ch. 4: The Development of Core Values; Ch. 5: The Communication of Core Values; Ch. 6: The Implementation of Core Values; Ch. 7: The Preservation of Core Values. What is especially helpful is that both personal and corporate core values are blended together in discussion format. Two levels are being addressed at the same time; one, is to help leaders define their own personal vision for ministry; two, leaders are being guided to define their ministry's core values as well. This book has been an oasis for this thirsty pastor! I would have liked to have been able to study it in a seminary leadership class.Values-Driven Leadership: Discovering and Developing Your Core Values for Ministry Overview

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The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life Review

The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life
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The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life ReviewIt can be extremely emotionally validating to realize some things you experienced as a child were unhealthy, especially if they get in the way of happy, productive relationships later in life. This book is about recognizing unhealthy, enmeshed relationships and learning how to move toward something more healthy. It teaches you how to do the work necessary to make things better for yourself. You won't change the parent who put you in an emotionally incestuous situation so don't waste your energy on an effort that's guaranteed to fail. Instead focus on learning new ways to respond to the unhealthy behaviors of your parents. This will enable you to recognize and change your own unhealthy behaviors, which is especially important if you are a parent who wants to end the cycle of emotionally-damaging parent/child relationships.
This book helps to identify, understand, and overcome many prior experiences that have been holding you back. It describes perfectly the relationship my husband had with his mother, his inability to pull away for so long, and the reaction of his family when he finally tried to gain a healthy distance from her. Recognizing this behavior and learning to deal with it was an emotional life saver for me. If I could give this book 10 stars, I would!The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life Overview

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Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life Review

Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life
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Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life ReviewAfter reading the one-star review by the reader from NY on March 14, 2000, I had to respond. It seems to me this person is awfully defensive and, I suspect, is guilty of some of the behavior that is described as abusive in the book...
No parent is perfect. We all know that. This book is not about demonizing parents. It is about learning to recognize incidents in our lives that adversely affect our behavior and our emotional well-being. I bought this book because of problems my husband and I were having with his parents. Since he was a child, he had been put into a role of emotional partner to his mother. When he decided to start doing some things on his own, she got very upset and started pouring on the guilt. I arrived on the scene at about the same time and became a convenient scapegoat, accused of manipulating him and stealing him away from them. Unfortunately (before I found this book and other helpful ones) things got really bad, and now we have virtually no relationship with my in-laws. It's a very sad situation. However, my husband and I now recognize the games for what they are and no longer buy into the idea that it's our fault for "upsetting" them so much that they just can't be around us. (If I hadn't experienced it myself, I wouldn't have believed that adults could behave in such an irrational manner! ) Reading books like this one and speaking with counselors has provided us with useful insights that will help us interact with them in a healthy manner, if we ever get the chance again.
If you're going through this too, you are NOT alone! Get this book and read it. It helps you recognize behaviors that are harmful to you. It helps you learn to overcome problems in the past and avoid inappropriate treatment in the future. I also recommend the book "The Adult Child's Guide to What's Normal" by John C. Friel and Linda Friel for anyone who found this book helpful. It's not as detailed, but it gives a lot of information in a very easy-to-read format. If you're being manipulated by your parent(s), I recommend "Emotional Blackmail," also by Susan Forward. If you were put into an inappropriate role by your parents, I strongly suggest "Emotional Incest Syndrome" by Patricia Love and Jo Robinson. The title is disturbing but the information is excellent!Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life Overview

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Making a Case for Life: A New Definition of Perfection Review

Making a Case for Life: A New Definition of Perfection
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Making a Case for Life: A New Definition of Perfection ReviewMaking a Case for Life by Stephanie Wincik is an eye opening book about Down Syndrome. Stephanie starts you out on a brief history of Down Syndrome then takes you into Myths associated with Down Syndrome. Myths that include Medical, Stress, and Burden on Society. Really these areas are eye opening in the book. We are often scared of the unfamiliar and rumors we hear from the medical community. With the tests being done now on pregnant women's blood during pregnancy to see if there are markers associated with a baby with Down Syndrome a lot of woman are now given the choice to decide if they want to carry a baby with Down Syndrome. But when given this choice they are also fed a lot of warnings and stories that may not be accurate depending on how familiar the doctor is with Down Syndrome. Stephanie specializes in health support for individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities living in community homes and her book really sheds light on some of the inaccuracies in information that is fed to mothers carrying babies with Down Syndrome. If more mothers were guided with correct information the number of babies with Down Syndrome being aborted would drop dramatically. This is definitely an eye opening book that anyone and everyone should read. Maybe with a little understanding of this Syndrome, peoples fear of the unknown would be calmed and acceptance and understanding would shine. Please check out her book and read for yourself!Making a Case for Life: A New Definition of Perfection Overview

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The Definition of Wind: A Novel (Random House Reader's Circle) Review

The Definition of Wind: A Novel (Random House Reader's Circle)
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The Definition of Wind: A Novel (Random House Reader's Circle) ReviewI have been waiting patiently to read another work by the author. Having previously read all of her prior works, I was excited when this was published. True to the previous, this did not disappoint. The Definition of Wind was one that I could not put down. Can't wait for more by this author, a true talent.The Definition of Wind: A Novel (Random House Reader's Circle) Overview

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